cantoneofthink (cantoneofthink) wrote in trans_psych,

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i'm new

i don't really use livejournal much but figured this group might be helpful. I'm scott, im an 18 y/o ftm, i've been on T for going on 2 years and had my chest surgery. When i was younger i found myself in hospitals a lot because of being suicidal/ and being a harm to myself. i've been on a lot of different anti-depressents and mood stabilizers which basically helped me none, T is what has really helped me and made me feel more like a human. 

I havent been to therapy in a long time and i dont take any more medication. i have 'major depression' and pretty bad anxiety. im doing a LOT better than i was in the past so i think that im doing pretty good, but to be honest im sick of having to struggle through everyday life. my anxiety makes it really hard to perform well in school, my attendance is horrible.  im getting a prescription for adavan (anti-anxiety) so hopefully that will help. also it seems that whenever i lay down to go to sleep i have an anxiety attack. 
i guess i just feel like, ive gotten myself this far, i do love myself, i have a better home environment now, and im trying damn hard to simply live my life, but with these issues holding me down im just curious how much can be overcome, or if im going to just have to "deal with it" forever. 

anyway, im not trying to rant or bitch or anything. but if anyone has any comments/advice thatd be cool, cause im tired of being tired all the time. 
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